


eyes all aglow;

by bunnyctzen



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, Christmas, Christmas Angst, Christmas Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Johnyong, M/M, anyway wow christmas i might post more of these, blows kiss love yall blease enjoy, brief mention of alcohol, nothing is descriptive, other than that its pretty pg this is the most pg thing ive ever written, some swearing idk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-29
Updated: 2018-11-29
Packaged: 2019-09-02 04:55:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16780015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bunnyctzen/pseuds/bunnyctzen
Summary: in which it's christmas eve, johnny is on a business trip in europe with a delayed flight, chicago is experiencing their worst winter storm in a decade that shows no signs of stopping, and taeyong has to cope with the fact that he'll need to spend this christmas alone.





	eyes all aglow;

**Author's Note:**

> hi hello whats good its ya boi lee who typed this out in only a couple hours bc i was feeling yuletide-y??? i'll probably do this with other ships maybe i'll make a series out of it also this is my first fic ive published so blease be nice i hope u enjoy???
> 
> anyway much love 2 the snake in my boot who beta’d and would also do anything in this world for johnyong
> 
> christmas !!!!
> 
> IMPORTANT UPDATE: i hated this so i edited the fuck out of it and i lapslocked it to fit with my brand slkgj sue me ok

there was something... _magical_ about little puffs of white falling from the sky on a late winter night, through the fog on the windows and illuminated by the street lights. bright lights of every colour lining the streets as house by house prepared for the holidays. the way they peeked ever so slightly through the white wall of a blizzard once the sun set made it feel like the entire world was trapped inside a giant snow globe. 

the smell of pine and the twinkling of piano keys coated the room in a warm, mystical feeling. the fireplace was lit, presents were under the tree, and fairy lights and garland hung along the window frames with careful placement. sugar cookies in the oven left an aroma that crept through the house, and little christmas trinkets sat along the mantle placed with care above the stockings. 

really, taeyong knew he should’ve been doing anything other than staring wistfully out the window, head cradled in his hand. a blanket and mug full of hot chocolate his only defense from the cold that always managed to still find him inside, no matter how high the heat was cranked. the kind of cold that settled into his bones for three months of the year, or four if they found themselves to be unlucky.

it was all a temporary fix in place of the real deal—taeyong knew there was only one thing that could truly warm him up from the inside out, but he wouldn’t be setting foot in o’hare for at least another three days on delay from his business trip in europe.

the weather station had called for the worst storm chicago had seen in a decade—a total white-out forecasted for days on end. cars and foot traffic were warned off of the roads as accidents piled up quicker than emergency responders could keep up with, and the snow only piled up foot by foot. taeyong had given up on shoveling their driveway a day ago; the entire city was shut down, and for as much as he hated to give the truth any more power than it already held, he understood that he had to be realistic and accept defeat.

as the clock ticked closer and closer down to the final hours of christmas eve, taeyong realized he’d be spending it alone this year.

it wasn’t as if johnny hadn’t promised—over and over again until he was blue in the face, and taeyong finally accepted his word for what it was.

_‘it’s just a short trip, yongie. i promise i’ll be home by christmas eve; when have i ever let you down?’_

maybe taeyong had spiked his eggnog earlier in the evening to ease the aching of his strained heart strings, but it was no one’s business but his own that even so much as glancing in the direction of the presents that lay under the tree were to blame for the tightness in his throat.

his own singular pair of boots lay by the door, and only one coat hung on the rack where two should be. there were no puddles trailing the hallway for taeyong to give his boyfriend hell over, and insist that johnny grabbed a towel before the flooring started to swell beyond repair with the moisture. with just a blanket and an extra log on the fire to keep him from freezing, taeyong lacked what he needed to warm his body and ease his spirit.

the star that sat atop the tree, once pristine and perfect, was now crooked with no one tall enough to reach it and set it back as it should be.

a cough racked at taeyong’s lungs when an unexpectedly rough tickle caught his throat by surprise—this, of course, caused him to wear half of the hot chocolate that was in his cup before he got the chance to set it down on the table in front of him.

_just his luck_.

by the time he finally caught his breath, throat raw and tears stinging at his eyes from the force of a small fit of coughing, taeyong felt real ones start to form.

maybe it was a touch dramatic to be crying alone on christmas eve, but taeyong felt nothing short of absolutely exhausted and overwhelmed. he’d been planning every detail for weeks, from the dishes served down to seating arrangements at the table. it was taeyong’s specialty—no one threw a christmas gathering quite like him. 

everything was supposed to work out as it always did; they’d spend the night together with red wine and smiles, reminiscing of times when they were younger and naïve in their love. about their christmases spent with extended family, and childhood stories of their best times.

burying his head in his hands, taeyong finally choked out a sob.

he’d be lucky to have johnny home by new years if the weather kept up as it currently did. gone were their plans of inviting their families and friends over to host a dinner, as was the turkey thawing in the fridge that johnny always made sure to put his magic touch on.

taeyong supposed he’d have to heat something up out of the ingredients he had prepared for their grand meal if he wanted to eat, but the mere thought sounded like blasphemy. it’d taste like emptiness and longing for what could’ve been. like disappointment. 

he decided against it.

the sudden ringing of his phone was startling, and taeyong _certainly_ knew needed to pull himself together if he had any hope of holding onto his dignity when answering. and so with the back of his sleeve, roughly, he wiped away his tears, cleared his throat, and sniffed. 

fuck, of _course_ it was a facetime from johnny, when he had no idea how he looked and he was wearing an entire mug of hot chocolate, but all he could do was put a brave face on, and hope those details could be looked over. 

everything was fine.

“hey baby, everything okay over there?” he was quick to put on a smile for johnny, subtly checking himself in his upper corner to make sure he looked okay. using a sweater paw to cover most of his face (in essence to both appear comfier, cuter, and like he hadn’t been crying), he allowed his smile to reach his eyes.

well, as long as he _acted_ like everything was fine, taeyong was sure he could convince them both that it was true. at least he had the darkness of the room around him to hide his red eyes and puffy face; he hoped it was enough 

“mm, now that you’re here it is.” the fondness in johnny’s voice was tangible—it made taeyong’s heart sing. it was exactly what he needed.

“you’re staying safe, right? i don’t wanna hear that you’ve gone out and tried to clear snow away when you’re supposed to be staying inside, yong. i know what you’re like.”

it was hard to tell where johnny was, minding that he was still in his work suit, and it was bright enough that taeyong’s eyes took a moment to adjust. still, in contrast to the _all business_ aura johnny wore along with his work attire, he was all smiles now that he’d gotten taeyong on the line. a smile he wore just in their moments together, that made taeyong remember just how easy it had been to fall in love with him. already, he felt more at ease.

“mm, promise i’ve stayed inside since it started getting bad— the city’s all shut down, you know? we’re supposed to get five feet of snow, and i can barely see the neighbours. i wouldn’t even be able to find my shovel if i wanted to.”

hearing johnny laugh, even for as tinny as it sounded through the metal of his phone, brought a genuine smile to taeyong’s face; it was surely… _enduring_ , having to be separated like this on what was supposed to be their favourite day of the year together, but if johnny could manage to find happiness trapped on the other side of the world during christmas, maybe taeyong could too.

“good, you don’t need that cold worsening. plus, you’ve uh, still got lots of food to keep you held over ‘til the stores open up again, right?” obviously, johnny referred to everything they’d bought in preparation for the large number of guests that were expected to be in attendance, and it soured the mood again for taeyong. this was ridiculously unfair.

“you’re um… holding up okay without me, right yongie? you’d tell me if you were feeling upset? fuck, you know i’d talk to you all night if you’d let me— i swear i’ve run laps around this airport a thousand times trying to find a solution and i’ve looked into all kinds of other options and i’m _so_ sorry this is happening because you know i’d do _anything_ to be right there with you, and i—”

taeyong could no longer in good conscience let johnny ramble himself out of breath, as he did when he so transparently wore his guilt and the rest of his heart on his sleeve around his loved ones. “stop, stop. listen, i promise i’m doing okay, alright? i’ve got hot chocolate and cookies in the oven, and if i can get doyoungie to cross a couple streets tomorrow on foot for me, i won’t be alone, okay? i promise we’ll get through this like we always do when you’re away. this isn’t the first time.”

while this was certainly true, with johnny working as an internationally operating and well-respected business partner, nothing so important as christmas had ever been missed. valentine’s day and johnny’s own birthday had been interrupted once or twice (he always deemed his own birthday less important than taeyong’s anyway, much to the younger’s adamant protest), but he always came home for important dates. this time was definitely different, but taeyong was positive he’d rather die than be the cause of any more of johnny’s guilt.

even amid his misery, however, taeyong couldn’t fight back a yawn in time—he was nothing short of absolutely exhausted after all the stress (stress cleaning, stress baking, and general depression) he’d been through since hearing the bad news.

“it’s late there, taeyong. you’re a terrible liar, and i’m not even gonna let you _try_ to convince me. you should get some sleep.”

“i’m _not_ tired, and your accusations are baseless. plus like, i’ve barely seen you, and you’re already trying to get rid of me.”

“hey, that’s not true, and you know it.” it was hard to deny that after all these years, johnny knew taeyong better than he knew himself.

“i also happen to know that you’ll be an early riser for the rest of your life, and you’re gonna hate yourself in the morning for staying up too late.”

taeyong couldn’t help but crack a fond smile, remembering to savour every moment he had of face-to-face time with johnny before one of them had to go. one of them always had to go.

“i haven’t even told you that i love you yet. and that i miss you, and i’m suing santa claus for keeping my boyfriend from me when i’ve got… _all_ these presents for him, and all of this delicious food he can’t even enjoy.” taeyong huffed, though he was almost positive his mood had done a full 180 since the start of his conversation. 

“do you think he still accepts letters in the off season, or should i look up an e-mail address?”

taeyong’s heart strings pulled in a different way when johnny let out a full-bodied laugh at his lame joke. 

fuck, he was _so_ in love with this man. 

“i’m sure if anyone could find a way to get a strongly worded letter to the big guy, it’d be you, baby.”

taeyong’s own face lit up just as easily; johnny was absolutely infectious with his positivity, and it was something that drew taeyong in even from the start. “damn right, i could. his people will be hearing from my people shortly.”

a moment of silence passed between the two, and the smile on taeyong’s face faded to a more concerned and serious expression in turn. he chewed at his bottom lip as he often did when he worried, playing with the hem on his sleeve.

“hey, you have to promise you’ll be safe too, okay? i don’t want you taking any shortcuts at the risk of your own safety to get here, just because it’s christmas. even if you don’t get here ‘til january 5th, i’d rather you come home safe and all in one piece than try to be an idiot and rush it.”

“yongie, you know i’ll be safe. it’s all the airport’s call, anyway—they won’t fly out when it’s dangerous. nothing’s gonna happen to me.”

“i’m serious, john suh. no trying to pull any romantic comedy shit to get here in time, okay? there’s gonna be other christmases, and nothing is worth risking your life to pull something dumb.”

“fine, fine. i promise if there’s any way to get back quicker, i’ll triple check to make sure it’s safe. i’ll make it back all in one piece, wrapped with a bow under the tree. no dumb shit.”

staring his boyfriend down through his phone camera to ensure the seriousness of his claim, taeyong finally nodded in satisfaction.

“good. you’re the most important present i’m getting this year, no matter what you have planned. there’s no christmas at all without you, even if we have to celebrate it late, okay?”

“mm, of course. i know.”

longing crept into taeyong’s chest—for johnny’s touch, reassurances, and safe return. he knew he only had a couple days longer to hold on, but the waiting always took a toll on him.

“yongie,”

“hm?”

“get some sleep now, yeah? you’ve got an early morning, and i’ve got some things i need to check on in a few.”

visibly, taeyong knew his deep sigh came across. still, strong-willed as he was on his own, he was always hopeless against johnny’s best wishes for him. as someone who always overworked himself and put his own needs last, johnny always knew exactly how to take care of taeyong the way he needed.

“mm, fine. only because i know arguing won’t get me anywhere with you.”

“that’s my baby.”

yawning again, taeyong began to rub at his eyes. he really _was_ exhausted, and hiding it was futile—johnny knew taeyong better than taeyong knew himself, and he certainly had a solid history of early mornings and waking up with the sun.

“hey, taeyong?”

taeyong looked back up at johnny for the final time, offering a tired smile.

“i love you, alright? you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. don’t forget it for a second.”

taeyong’s reactions slowed as his eyelids grew heavier; his smile might’ve been weak, but it was surely still just as warm, and wider than before.

“you too, you big loser. come back to me and warm me up, i’m freezing without you.”

“wouldn’t dream of missing out on that for the world.”

“mm, ’night, johnny. you get some sleep too.” taeyong paused, taking his last moments to revel in the sight of his lost loved one. “love you.”

“love you too, yong. sleep well—i’ll be home before you know it. promise.”

one last wave between screens, and it was over. taeyong closed his eyes briefly, and his smile slowly faded with the passing moments.

he was alone again.

and he was nothing short of absolutely fatigued, so he took his cookies (johnny’s favourites, of course) out of the oven and boxed them up, did his evening skincare, and headed to sleep, trying to ignore just how cold it was in his bed without his giant human radiator of a boyfriend to hold him through the night.

in a mere few hours as promised, taeyong felt his body betray him as he began to rise with the morning’s sun. there was a relentless pounding in his head as he remembered instantly how much he’d had to drink last night. far more than he normally did as a lightweight—he scolded himself for not drinking more water or leaving painkillers and a glass at his own bedside. 

he knew he had to at least attempt to remedy his misery, so after procrastinating for five minutes in bed, he groaned and blindly made his way to the kitchen for a glass of water and a tylenol. all the while, he was definitely regretful to have forgotten socks or slippers to defend him from the hardwood flooring’s icy surface.

it was hard to miss the tree in the living room, and the immediate disappointment the sight of it filled taeyong with. 

it was christmas morning.

it was also far too early for phone calls of well wishes from anyone he was close to; everyone knew taeyong was an early riser, but it certainly wasn’t a trait his loved ones shared. his friends were still too young to have kids rising them in the early morning to see what santa had brought, so he had a few hours of silence to himself to—sulk, he guessed?

taeyong was struck with johnny’s absence again, as he threw back a capsule and washed it down with some water. he prayed, at the moment, for two things—that wherever johnny was at this moment, he was still safe, and that his own headache would ease enough that at least his pain could remain only emotional.

there was nothing productive to do with his time now that no one would be attending the lee-suh residence’s christmas dinner, so taeyong found himself at a loss for what to do with himself at all. he supposed, what with the entire city being snowed in, that he could just go back to bed for a couple hours both to pass the time quicker and shake his hangover,

following this plan with a sigh, he put his glass away in the dishwasher, made a quick pit stop to pee so as to not be awoken in another fifteen minutes by the urge, and finally settled back under his blankets.

taeyong felt cold. unsettlingly cold, and deeply lonely.

even though sleep shrouded his thoughts in a thick fog, johnny’s absence could be felt. the entire _house_ felt cold without his loud, radiant energy, and the same reflected inside taeyong’s chest.

sleep—taeyong needed sleep, and maybe when he woke up, he’d find some company, so he wouldn’t have to be alone anymore. so he’d have mouths to feed and gifts to give, and all of this could feel even slightly more like christmas.

taeyong was grateful that it wasn’t too difficult for sleep to find him again—a christmas miracle, he supposed, as his last coherent thought before he fell unconscious.

_knock knock knock_ —

much to his dismay, taeyong immediately jolted awake. part of being an early riser also meant that he was a terribly light sleeper, and if a slight change in the sun could pull him from his slumber, surely the knocker on the front door was overkill.

how long had he actually napped for? it seemed like it was still daylight out, but he didn’t actually have the time to check his phone, because someone was at the door.

_knock knock knock knock_ —

“i’m coming, hold on!”

grabbing the closest hoodie he could reach (that he assumed to be johnny’s based both off of smell and sheer size), taeyong threw it on with his finally located slippers before he finally reached the door.

_knock knock_ —

“god, will you be patient? i’m right h—”

taeyong, in his entire life, had never had the wind knocked out of him; he’d never been athletic, or in any fights, or experienced any injuries of the sort that might have a similar effect.

however, there was a first for everything.

“ _johnny_?”

comically, taeyong even rubbed his eyes sleepily to make sure his eyes weren’t playing tricks on him. because in fact, right there in front of him stood his six-foot-something boyfriend, dressed smartly in his business pea coat and with all of his luggage, right on his doorstep.

johnny, who owned a key to a house he shared with taeyong, had clearly knocked for dramatic effect—it certainly worked.

all taeyong could do was stand shocked as he tried to catch his breath. this was happening. this was for real. in real life, and in the flesh, his own johnny suh stood on their front porch with a hopeful smile, and warm eyes.

it took all of two seconds of regained cognitive thought for taeyong to immediately jump into the man’s arms, completely uncaring of the inclement weather around them. unbothered for once, really, because nothing could matter more than this.

the best christmas present taeyong ever could’ve received.

taeyong felt a warm chuckle vibrate through johnny’s body as he squeezed the life out of him—finally he stood up on his toes, and kissed the man he’d been missing for the better part of a week now with every emotion he’d felt in their time apart.

“it’s really me, yongie. promise.” johnny managed to get out between kisses, holding the shorter man just as tight. it was clear that he had missed taeyong just as deeply.

after a couple minutes of reunion celebration, finally, johnny pulled away to clear his throat.

“for as romantic as all of this is, quite frankly taeyongie, it’s freezing out here and you’ve only got pajamas on with a cold you’re fighting. can we take this inside?”

taeyong took a couple seconds to actually process johnny’s words before he was finally nodding frantically, grabbing his boy by his sleeve and dragging him along inside. johnny was smart enough to have his suitcases on hand to save himself a trip, and taeyong was ever grateful for it.

he was home.

“you’ve really been slacking this year, baby. it’s ten on christmas morning, and i don’t smell anything cooking?”

“okay, in my defence, chicago is basically on lockdown ‘til the plows and salt trucks get out and clear the roads.” looking up at johnny, hands on his hips, his brows furrowed.

“do you also want to tell me how in actual hell you’re standing here in front of me right now?”

“christmas miracle?” johnny shrugged, smile innocent—the look taeyong gave him turned it a little more guilty.

“...or a flight to the next state over, and a hell of a commute. the roads are actually pretty clear though, so maybe miracles aren’t out of the question just yet.”

“john suh, you _drove_?” taeyong was bewildered. that _certainly_ wasn’t the plan they’d discussed, and if he weren’t so happy that he was here in the flesh on christmas day, he would’ve fully lost it.

johnny simply shrugged.

“minor details. i’m here now, right? and i’m safe, and if we do presents now, we’ll still have time to make anything.” johnny started, shrugging off his coat and unlacing his boots. 

“actually, hey, do you think i’ll have time to get the turkey in so it’s out for when people get here? people are still coming, right? the roads are back up, and i’m sure they’re announcing it on the news again with a safety warning and all, but—”

“we’re… still doing christmas?” in taeyong’s defense, he was still pre-morning-coffee, and his entire world had just been turned upside down. he hadn’t expected to hear johnny say such things.

“well duh, haven’t you been planning it all year?”

hours later, every seat at taeyong’s table was filled with his loved ones (and then some)—enjoying company, and a dinner that turned out better than all their years prior. heart filled to the brim, taeyong considered that maybe miracles really did happen on christmas.

**Author's Note:**

> established canons:  
> -once taeyong finally came to he really whooped johnny's ass for driving when he could've died  
> -mother taeyong is always cooking the whole ass ot21  
> -johnny only knows how to make the turkey and stuffing well everything else is taeyong we literally don't even know how johnny is so good or if he trusts the basting system or not  
> -i might do more fics in this au i like this dynamic  
> -ok thats it thank u for ur time taeyong makes the best sugar cookies and hosts a kickass dinner every holiday
> 
> anyway im bad at these uhhhhh leave comments and kudos if u enjoyed and come yell at me on twitter (@xingowo) and encourage me to do more christmas ships??


End file.
